oops I did it again!

I was once again sleeping on the couch yesterday.  When I awoke, I thought I was very lucid.  This then happened:

Me: Did [patient's name] go home today?  Because he was supposed to once his blood culture is negative x 72 hours

Kevin: I don't know what you are talking about.

Me: I guess you wouldn't know, because he is actually Diana's patient.  But Diana was off today, wasn't she?  So you should have been covering for her patients.

Kevin: I don't know who you are talking about.

Me: [frustrated] Diana Chen, the new intern.

Kevin: [was very amused at this point and came over to the couch to look at me].

Me: [exasperated] I am not sleeptalking!!  I am awake!

Kevin: I know you are not! [laughs]

Me: I really am not sleeptalking!

I then quickly realized that while the content of my speech was accurate (I really did know that patient under Diana's care who is supposed to go home; no Game of Thrones characters on the service this time), I was directing my questions to the wrong person.  I thought Kevin was actually John, my co-resident for the last two weeks....  

Me: I start wards again on Thursday!

Roommate: What is wards again?  Prison?

Me: What?

Roommate: I mean, cells?

Me: ....

He eventually figured out that "rooms" was the word he was looking for, since patients are admitted into the hospital and stay in hospital rooms.

bravery

A few months ago I saw a 18-year-old with autism.  At first I was a little scared, since he towered above me and was obese. (Over 6 feet tall and BMI was like 35 or something).  I saw that he had progressively gained weight with each of his past visits, so I wanted to draw diabesity labs.  But since he had autism, he was very scared of needles.  Just at the last visit, it took a monumental effort to convince him to just get a vaccine.  After some coaxing by me and my attending, he finally agreed to do it.  We called Child Life to come help calm him down, but he then adamantly declared, "I don't need any help!!!!"

He successfully had his labs drawn for the first time in his life without incident.  He was extremely proud of himself.  His mom was very proud too.  I myself was very proud of him.  He then made statements like, "I feel half of my blood is gone," but was smiling all the time.  Several weeks later, I called the family to tell them the lab results, and his mom told me he had been asking about them everyday, so significant an event it was.  

I saw a very shy 2-year-old in the Peds ED.  She was so shy that she only opened her mouth a little bit when I asked her to, and looked scared during my history and physical.  Since her complaints were fever and abdominal pain, to test for peritonitis I then picked her up and lifted her up and down while saying "Whee whee!!"  (I couldn't lift her up that high though since I have limited upper body strength).  As I did that, she finally smiled!

A month ago I was on the Anesthesia rotation, where I successfully put in peripheral IVs!!!!  Yea yea, I know, it's just PIVs, but since the last time I did them was in med school, I thought it was super cool. 

I then tried intubations.  After multiple failures where all the patients either had small jaws/obesity/crooked airways, I then finally had a patient who had ideal mannequin airway anatomy, and I successfully intubated her!  I then wrote "Booyah!" on my procedure log.

not quite awake yet

On Saturday, I was napping on the couch in my house.  I dreamed that I was in the resident room in the hospital, talking about my patients to the residents who were coming on the next shift.  I had been reading a ton of Game of Thrones wiki the day before.  One of my patients was Robert Baratheon, a Game of Thrones character, who is in the hospital because he has pneumonia, the same type I had.

I woke up and mistook my housemate Kevin as a resident I was talking to in the resident room.

Elaine: "What happened to Robert Baratheon?"

Kevin: "Who?"

Elaine thinks, "It doesn't make sense that Robert Baratheon, a fictional character, would be on my service.  I must have remembered the patient's name wrong or something."

Me: "You know, the patient who has a cough, the same type of cough as me."

Kevin: "Come again?"

Me [confused and groggy]: "Do we have any patients right now?"

Kevin: "Well I don't know about you, but I don't."

It took me some more time to register that Kevin is not a doctor, and therefore he does not have any patients.  I then concluded that since I am currently on vacation, that I don't have any patients either.  I can't quite remember what happened after that, but I think I went back to sleep.

The next day I asked Kevin about the conversation and he said he was really confused.

I took care of an 8-year-old boy who broke his leg in October and underwent surgical intramedullary nail placement inside his femur for stabilization.  He came back last week for scheduled nail removal.

On admission interview:

Med student: When was the last time you pooped?

Boy: Ewwww!

Med student: Come on now.

Boy: I have always been able to P-O-O-P-O-O. [He spelled it out]

Me: Poopoo?

Boy: I didn't want to say it.

On discharge exam, the Ortho intern removed the ACE wrap around his leg to check the dressing underneath.  There was a splotch of dried blood on the dressing.

Boy [wide-eyed]: What is that?  Is that ketchup?

requires utmost concentration!!

Like:
10-month-old boy in clinic who is all smiles the entire time that I first saw him.  When I went out to present to the attending and came back into the room later, he has a new look of intense concentration on his face, with furrowed brows and pressed lips.

Me: "Why does he look so concentrated?"


Mom: "He's pooping."




Later:
Mom to boy: "Are you done?"
[Boy still looks very focused]
Mom: "Nope."